Pets

I have pet rats, 5 of them.  I love them to bits and I think they’re fucking perfect.  My bank account corroborates that statement.

I talked to my dad today who wants me to come visit him in a southern state(I live in the Midwest) over winter.  I told him to commit to dates and give them to me so I arrange a pet-sitter. He said “What pets…Oh the rats?  Who cares about pet rats anyway?”

Why me, your kid cares about pets.  I’d say that you raised me, but that’d really be a lie, given that you really just financed the raising of me.  I acknowledge that as my pets, I am responsible for making sure they have the highest quality of life possible and that means pet-sitters when I’m gone, vet visits, healthy food, and lots of toys.

I get that rats, or any rodent aren’t lots of peoples idea of a perfect pet, but please respect that they are pets and deserve to be treated as such.  They aren’t disposable and they aren’t just things I got on a whim.

• /rant

August 4, 2012

August 4, 2012.  Today would have been my paternal grandmothers 80th birthday.  She died April 2011.

Raise a glass to her.  To paying it forward.  To it getting easier.  To never changing a thing.

Call, email or write your grandparents a letter.  Tell them you love them.

The End.

The End Goal Of Fatherhood

“If you raise a girl with some confidence and you send her out in the world so she feels like she can do whatever she wants, she’s still going to get her face and her ass fucked but she’s going to do it on her terms. She’s going to grab that dick by the base and go, “I want to suck this right now”. This should be your goal as a father: That your daughter only sucks a dick that she thinks is delicious.”

                  -Louis CK

Why I want more than one child.

I want more than one child for sort of a morbid reason. I want more than one child because when me and my partner get old and sick and need help my multiple children can potentially help share the load, where as a single child has no choice but to assume all the responsibility.

 

Why you’ll settle, and it’ll be ok.

We hear a lot about why you shouldn’t ever settle when dating and that’s such crap advice because everyone will settle and settling isn’t bad in itself.

My girlfriends(and myself) have said to each other a 1000 times,  “you’ll meet the perfect person. Don’t worry.”  You won’t meet prince charming.  They won’t be helpful and considerate, and handsome and be the most attractive thing you’ve ever set eyes on.  You won’t meet them, and that’s ok, because you won’t be worse off because of it.

You’ll meet someone who does something that annoys the piss out of you, and if they’re the one  you choose to settle down with you will learn to deal with it.

 

As seen on reddit: Abortion

Click me. 

If I ever needed an abortion, I’d hope to god I had exactly what this young woman has.  I’d hope that my partner would do pretty much exactly that.

I’d honestly probably make the same decision she did, to the T.  I’d probably not tell him until I had made my final decision and I don’t think there is any shame or blame in that.

 

arghhhh!

I’m extra annoyed with my dad right now.  I had a very strange conversation with him the other day and after much fixating on it, I decided that no matter how you look at it he’s a douchebag.

him:Do you have a girl, errr boy,errr are you seeing someone right now?”

Me:  No.  Why? Him: How would you feel about coming down(he lives in texas) with your brother and his girlfriend?

me: That depends.  Where am I staying?

him: -laugher-  Nevermind.  Don’t worry about it then.

Anyway, that’s conversation and I’m not going to go into full blown bitching mode.  Just post this.

In honor of fathers day.

The singular best word to describe my father is absent.  When we talk it’s over the phone and it’s short conversations where he’s too busy talking over me to appreciate or take in what I have to say.

That said about my father, he has taught me a lot about parenting.  He taught me that you should only ever have children if you really, really want them.  That you shouldn’t have them because your partner wants them, you should really want them because if you don’t really, really want them, you’ll eventually grow to resent them.  He taught me that you can never lie by omission, especially in families.  Whatever you think you’ve gotten away with, you haven’t .  He taught me that you can’t treat your children unequally, not in the slightest and he taught me that there are some traditions you don’t need to carry onto your own children.

But most of all, he taught me that I have the very best mother on the face of the planet.  My mother did everything she had to protect us kids after my parents divorced.  She was amazing.  She assumed the role of mom and dad all in one happy smiling package with the drop of a hat.  She was damn near flawless at it.  I didn’t realize it then.  I didn’t realize the massive sacrifice it took on her part.  I didn’t realize back then that I had the best mom on the face of the planet.   My mom is probably the most blessed woman on the planet, and she’s worked extremely hard for those blessings.  She has two holidays devoted to her because she somehow managed to assume the role of mom and dad .

I hope I never have to do what she did, but I know that if I have to, if the cards fall in such a fashion that I someday have to do what my mom did, I know I’ll be able too, because I’m her kid and I’m tough as nails and I can do anything.  Just please dear god, don’t ask me to respond rationally when pest control comes into my apartment to spray for bugs. 

Things not to post about on Facebook.

On what planet is this deemed normal and acceptable behavior?    Breakups are almost always ugly, breakups where a child is involved are even uglier.  So why do you need to make it even uglier by talking about it so publicly on Facebook.  Bitching about your ex is a normal part of the process, but do it with the guys over a beer, rather on facebook.

That is all.

Love…or something like it.

Every now and then I’m reminded of how fantastic some of the people I call my friends are.

My god, I love you guys.