Archive for February, 2014


Love comes in all forms.

Sometimes it comes with a ring and a series of promises.  Sometimes it just comes with a commitment, but sometimes it comes with neither.  Sometimes you just take it at face value when it comes and roll with the rest.

I love you. I love how you fit into my life.  I love how I get you unfettered, when I get you.  None of the messy business of life getting in our way.


Read me.

Articles like this are hardly surprising results to any bdsm practitioners, if you asked us, it’s common knowledge.  But when articles like this come out, I get very nervous.  

See, these articles rarely touch on the the steps it takes to reach that point with a kinky partner.  They don’t talk about the safety measures that are taken, or how long it took to build up the trust  to reach that point.  And that’s what makes me nervous, that people will read it, go out and buy a flogger and proceed to try and achieve the same results only to find that not only is it not working, you’ve gone to far with your partner and now need to undo the damage you did while you were trying to get “high.”



Most people, tend to agree that living authentically matters,  but the trouble with living authentically, is that it’s hard.  It’s really hard.

They don’t teach how to live authentically when you’re anyone but the family behind the white picket fence.  When you’re that family, the one behind the white picket fence with 2.5 kids, a dog, and a standard two parent household.  Living authentically for those families( god bless them!) is easy, well comparatively, I’m sure they have their gripes too.   Actually, I know they do.

But for me, not so cut and dry.

I can’t introduce my family to my partners without a serious conversation that I don’t want to have.  If they meet Partner A, and know we’re dating, then at some point in the future they might meet Partner B – my family will ask “What happened to partner A?  When did you break up?”  Being honest means coming out, and being dishonest, while it’s in some ways the easier option, it’s an absolute disservice to my relationship with Partner A.  We didn’t break up.  He still loves me, and I still love him, but I also love Partner B.   I don’t know how to live authentically, well that’s a lie.  I know what it would take.  But I don’t know if I can do what it’d take, or if it’d be worth the trouble.

My family is amazing and they’d love me no matter what,  but do I want to have the conversation about my dating preferences with my family? Would it be worth it?

I wouldn’t change my polyness for anything.  I love dating and living like this.  I love how it fits me and to be honest, I couldn’t imagine doing it any other way and most of the time, I wouldn’t change a thing.  But this, is  a circumstance in which I would change it.