In honor of fathers day.

The singular best word to describe my father is absent.  When we talk it’s over the phone and it’s short conversations where he’s too busy talking over me to appreciate or take in what I have to say.

That said about my father, he has taught me a lot about parenting.  He taught me that you should only ever have children if you really, really want them.  That you shouldn’t have them because your partner wants them, you should really want them because if you don’t really, really want them, you’ll eventually grow to resent them.  He taught me that you can never lie by omission, especially in families.  Whatever you think you’ve gotten away with, you haven’t .  He taught me that you can’t treat your children unequally, not in the slightest and he taught me that there are some traditions you don’t need to carry onto your own children.

But most of all, he taught me that I have the very best mother on the face of the planet.  My mother did everything she had to protect us kids after my parents divorced.  She was amazing.  She assumed the role of mom and dad all in one happy smiling package with the drop of a hat.  She was damn near flawless at it.  I didn’t realize it then.  I didn’t realize the massive sacrifice it took on her part.  I didn’t realize back then that I had the best mom on the face of the planet.   My mom is probably the most blessed woman on the planet, and she’s worked extremely hard for those blessings.  She has two holidays devoted to her because she somehow managed to assume the role of mom and dad .

I hope I never have to do what she did, but I know that if I have to, if the cards fall in such a fashion that I someday have to do what my mom did, I know I’ll be able too, because I’m her kid and I’m tough as nails and I can do anything.  Just please dear god, don’t ask me to respond rationally when pest control comes into my apartment to spray for bugs. 


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