A)  I’m ovulating.  Which means I could orgasm 1000 times and come back for more.

B) My father is going to find out I’m going to the vagina doctor and getting an STI screen done this week.  Two years ago I voted in a poll on facebook about my favorite sex toy manufacturer and my father saw it by snooping on my stepmom’s facebook feed.  He commented about on his facebook.  Something about how his daughter no longer likes barbies or something.  Just please, kill me now.  I’ll give you money.  Lots and lots of money.

C) One of my menstrual cups is missing.  Has anyone seen it?

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